I am Bad at Parking

The path to self acceptance is sometimes flippant

A couple of years ago, I embraced the truth that I am bad at parking. I'm a decent driver. but I'm rarely able to pull into that space and end up with the car in the center of the space, parallel to the lines. Seriously. So often I'm almost on one line, or the other, or occasionally both. I spent a lot of time trying to do it right the first time, only to have to back and fill a couple of times to "get it right."

Finally, one day I just left the car that way because I was in a hurry. Cringing as I walked away, I said "I'm bad at parking. Good thing I'm good at other things." And it became a thing I said, often, after that. It's been several years that I've been doing this. I recently was talking to a friend about it and for her, the idea of parking poorly and inconveniencing other people really upset her. And honestly I totally get that. We are all in this together and someone parking badly is an inconvenience. But it is a small inconvenience and mostly, my bad parking doesn't affect anybody else. 

I found that saying "I'm bad at parking. Good thing I'm good at other things." circumnavigated the part of me that insisted I had to do everything right. It was a little freeing. In taking the edge off of my need to be perfect in one area of my life, it's kind of bled over into other areas. It's giving me a little bit of practice in just embracing that I exist and I'm here and I'm going to not be perfect all the time. And sometimes, after I thought that phrase, I would think about the things that I am good at and start listing some of them. So by embracing a flaw, I started identifying my assets and reminding myself of some of them.

There is a guideline I have seen that suggests you spend 80% of your time developing things you are good at (and that you enjoy)  and 20% working on improving the things you're not good at. It seems counterintuitive but a person can pour hours into something they're bad at and hardly improve. But with the things you're good at? That focus will help you soar. Embracing being bad at parking has given me permission to not focus and not stress on one thing. Recognizing that I'm bad at something gave me more energy and time to get other stuff done. And, because I wasn't stressing on that one thing, I was a bit more relaxed and enjoyed driving and arriving a little more. And I could focus a little more on the things I am good at.

And, at times when I could be less stressed about it, I have, somewhat, improved my parking. Because taking up 1.2 parking places really is rude and that matters to me. But, now, I can also choose to look at the caddywumpus car, laugh at my foible, and move on. Which is another thing I have practiced with this. Being bad at parking is not a huge flaw. It's a foible. It has become a quirky bit that I can be gently amused by. And in doing so, I also get to remember that there are other things I am good at.